My year - 2020.1 Femoral surgery part 2

 You Can read Part 1 Here.... As I said it's been a long year thus far.

Coming home on that Saturday then after exhausting myself doing miscellaneous chores with next to zero sleep I began thinking about what life would or could be without the Hub's..?.. It was then that I decided I needed a plan for the What If moment 'if'' it came.

Was I prepared to manage on my own..?..

Do I know what bills are coming in..?..

What about yearly expenses..?..

What about home upkeep/repair expenses..?..

My car is paid for but What if I need a new one, could I afford it..?..

I needed a Single Plan..!..

I don't want to be one of those blubbering widows that don't have a clue as to what to do. Will I be sad? Of course! This man is the Greatest. And I truly want to spend many, many more years together. But I'm going to be realistic too. 

The next morning [Sunday} driving to the hospital I called my SIL...I explained what I was getting ready to see her Brother...and hopefully she would understand my stand point. The 1 1/2 drive gave me plenty to time to organize my thoughts. Time to emotionally prepare myself. Physically I was Tired...and felt it deep into my bones.

I arrived and thankfully he was sitting up and much more coherent, but still bed ridden due to both legs having surgeries. We found out he had MSSA so was also hooked up with a PIC line for Antibiotics. We talked for a bit, filling in the gaps he couldn't remember from surgery until now, nurses came and went, then I told him I wanted to have a frank discussion with him. It started like this---

"I Love You..deeply-truly Love You but since you are determined to make me a widow Much earlier than I want to be, I will be making a Single plan. It's been over 20yrs since being totally single and I need to learn How to do it again. It sucks! But I need to be realistic and prepare. And It Begins Today. I'm mentality, physically, emotionally Exhausted. I will be here every morning but I'm not going to spend 6-8hrs at the hospital like I did the other 4 hospital stays and then drive 1 1/2 hrs home and try to get every day household maintenance/chores done. I hope you understand." He said he understood and knows that it was a lot for me, and that he Loved me More!

We talked some more, he asked me to call a few people to let them know what was going on....and I said No much to his surprise. I promptly handed him his phone and a charger and told him No I'm not making any calls. If you want people to know how you are call them yourself or not it didn't matter to me I'm tired. 

When lunch arrived and everything set up, I grabbed my purse ready to head out when I seen his shocked face! He asked if I was going downstairs to eat lunch? Nope..I'm eating when I get home. Gave him a kiss, asked if there was anything he needed and told him I would call later to check on him. Mind you I cried All. The. Way. To. My. Car. and All. The. Way. Home!

I did the same thing on Monday left at lunch time...again Crying all the way to my car, and on the way home.

And on Tuesday left at lunch time....cried to the car, sit there for a few minutes and told myself to Suck It Up! Then went Home.

Wednesday left at lunch time, didn't cry.

Thursday left at lunch time. didn't cry.

Friday I was just about out the door when the floor nurse called me, looking back our convo was a bit amusing...

Nurse: Ms Cline?

Me: yes this is she

Nurse: your husband says you've been leaving early all week?

Me: umm yeah {was he telling on me?}

Nurse: well I do want to let you know, Once we get your classes set up this afternoon, your Hubby is being released later today.

Me: Oh OK...Classes??

Nurse: yes Ma'am, you are to go through Diet/Nutrition - Silver Sneaker PT - PIC line/antibiotic training - Wound Care.

Me: Hmmm😕

I made it to the hospital and the very first thing he asked was ''did the nurse call you?' Yep she did I replied back.... He says..ok good I didn't want you to have to make another trip back tonight....LOL, well it's a good thing you did have her call 'cause I wouldn't have came back tonight, you would've had to wait until after I finished working at my race tomorrow morning.

Then we waited, there were multiple Dr's that need to sign off for his release. I did my 'classes' acing the heart healthy diet [he's been on that for years], Silver Sneakers piece of cake - been trying to keep him active for years, Wound Care??not my first time people [4 previous surgeries]..PIC line - Whoa Nelly! Nope !! Nada!! Zilch !! not ME!! Do you know where that goes too? and Are You Crazy!! Ya need to be calling in Home Health and I do Not care how much it is to have them..., This #nursewife Will Not be messing with PIC lines.

I'm closing Part 2 here, next I'll post about being home....